Confusing Signs of the Times

Steven Alan Green
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Nothing makes sense to me anymore.  Half of today’s music doesn’t interest me, whatever the hell is going on in Washington these days, and signage. 


First of all, bad, confusing signage that we see every day all around us throughout our daily lives and it doesn’t really have to be that way.  But it is.  Every single day I run across confusing and even contradictory signage all around me.  Things that – if I really thought it through – would make probably my brain explode.  Don’t get me started on the purposefully confusing parking street signs in Los Angeles.  I’m working on my mayoral campaign.


You need to hire a lawyer and consult clergyman just to be on the legal part of the street at the right time, therefore consequently valuable brain-time is taken up trying to avoid trouble.  The signs I’m talking about are every day businesses trying to reach out and reassure or sell us something, therefore to make us feel safe and secure by buying or using their product.  However, more often than not they wouldn’t pass a 7th grade English class. Take for example my gym. 


I can understand installing an alarm on a gym door because you don’t want anyone working out to be able to go outside and get some fresh air, but at least the sign should make sense.  Consequently, “Door is alarmed” is a badly worded and misleading phrase.  The door has feelings?  What alarmed it?  Was it given bad news?  Is it unhinged?  The proper wording would be “Door alarm is armed”.  I want my gym to not just run a clean joint, but to actively clean up it’s miscommunication.


And, what about inspirational signage?  Words and phrases set up solely for the purpose of getting us through another day and not forgetting our long-term goals? Shouldn’t they not be in proximity of a public service message to quit smoking?  Never give up?  I think giving up smoking is something everyone should do like right away.  I’d like to see the very smart minds that run a school think about the hidden messages they’re unwittingly giving out.  The schools teach our children, not the other way around.


Or how about basic marketing of food products.  I keep asking myself, are they chicken tacos that are tiny or area these tacos which are made from mini chickens?


Finally, doesn’t anybody think content of business within context of modern culture?  If they think they’re being cute, then Kurt and Courtney realtors should sell houses that are great to overdose in.  I mean, WTF. 

Anyway, nobody’s perfect and thank God for that.  Keeps me very amused.

For The Hollywood Dog, this is Steven Alan Green 4-6-17


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